The Science of Serendipity

Is serendipity a gift of grace or a natural result of a certain mindset?

Last week I was feasting my eyes and ears on Carole King, watching interviews, adoring her live performances on You Tube, and reading her memoir, A Natural Woman. 

So, imagine my surprise when on Monday night two women approached my dinner table while serenading me with a classic Carole King song, Tapestry.

It felt surreal and amazing. How could they know there already was a Carole King concert going on in my heart? 

Synchronicity? Coincidence? The Law of Attraction? 

Whatever it was, it was utterly delightful.

It reminded me of an experience I had twenty years ago. 

I had just written a song that began with the lyric:

So I tuck you in child, and I kiss you goodnight
Then I read you a story and turn out the light
But before I go, I want you to know
My love

At that time, 1995, I never imagined I would ever be a father. I wrote it to help me re-parent myself. I sang it over and over again that day I wrote it, serenading my inner child while gazing in the mirror. 

That night a friend came over with a video we had planned to watch together. But she also had something else in her pocketbook. A surprise. 

“Scott, before we watch the movie, I’ve a gift for you, but to receive it, you must first slip into some pajamas, get under the covers, and pretend it's bedtime.” 

She proceeded to read me a children’s story about a troubadour, as if she was tucking me in.


How did she know?
 
In 1995 I got to record that song with my producer, Peter Sprague.

Listen to it here: A Child’s Lullaby 

Do take note of the moment where I got to sing four part harmony with myself, a multiple orgasm of vocal pleasure if there ever was one. It happens 3:56 into the song.

Do you believe that what you dwell upon, mentally and emotionally, creates a tractor beam that draws life experiences to you? 

I do. But I didn’t always believe that.

I grew up in a family that was totally into positive thinking. We were totally positive that our thinking had nothing to do with what happened in our lives!

 Like many of us, my upbringing in this culture conditioned me to focus on what I didn't have, what I didn’t want, and the worst-case scenarios that might occur at any moment. It's as if there was a character in my mind as grumpy and negative as Scrooge. Any expansive, positive attitudes and ideas that might lead to feelings of enchantment, excitement and possibility were quickly struck down with a “Bah, humbug!” by this character.

I nicknamed him the SKEPTIC.

The SKEPTIC believed that life was cruel, and that all things ended in disappointment. 

He also believed that if I allowed my subconscious to repeat the mantra, “Life is cruel and all things end in disappointment” over and over, I would not be so disappointed by the harshness of life.

His goal was to prepare and protect me by discounting anything that might threaten my reality as I know it. When I was young, the SKEPTIC put a powerful pair of dark sunglasses on my eyes. They filtered out anything too bright, new, weird, or far out. They fit so snugly that after a while it seemed as if they weren’t there.

 On the morning of my first day of high school I woke up with the first of many severe acne breakouts, and it felt to me like the end of the world was at hand. For two years, going to school was hell, and under the strict restraining orders of my SKEPTIC, I took no risks, kept my head low, and reached out to no one, especially the opposite sex. 

In my junior year, the strain of hiding became too great, and I moved myself into some self-expression. I wrote for a school newspaper, ran for student office, and auditioned for a school play.

Landing the starring role in a comedy, I was to play an awkward teenager with a face full of pimples, few social skills, and zero dates. 

In other words, myself!

When I took a more thorough look at the script I seriously considered backing out. I had to say things like “Damn these zits! I’ll never get a girl interested in me!" and "If anyone knew just how scared I was, they would laugh or throw up. Or both!” 

This would not be acting, but a harsh reality show of the most embarrassing kind, a cruel form of social suicide. The only thing more terrifying than doing the play would be everyone in school knowing exactly why I backed out. I had to follow through.

 My performance turned out to be a big breakout hit. For the first time in life, breaking out was a good thing. Even more surprising was how much I enjoyed it, and how I felt myself relaxing and lightening up about my pimply predicament. When the play was over I had fewer secrets, and overnight became a visible and popular person in the school. I was invited to parties, given compliments, and approached by people - even female people!

Within a week of doing the play, I woke up to something major staring back at me from the mirror: a clear complexion!  In breaking out of an emotional prison, somehow my face stopped breaking out. 

What was up with that? Serendipity? Was there a connection? The SKEPTIC, certain there was no link, classified it as a coincidence, and gave the credit to the new acne cream I was using. There was no possibility in his mind that the clearing had something to do with letting some light and levity shine on my then terribly serious sense of self. 

The SKEPTIC was certain there was no science to serendipity, no such thing as mind over matter. He convinced me to forget that woo-woo stuff.  Never mind, doesn't matter.
 
Three years later I was diving into books on metaphysics, and began experimenting with using affirmations and visualizations. 

The SKEPTIC looked the other way and did not protest, so long as my curiosity stayed at the dabbling level. No commitment, no threat. I was writing prosperity statements like “I am a money magnet” twenty times in the morning and again at night.

After a few days of this, I walked onto a New York City subway and spied a five-dollar bill on the floor near my feet. Pocketing the surprise, I promptly forgot about it and went about my business. In all my years of living in the city, I had never found any bill larger than a dollar, but I did not link the five-spot with my affirmative gymnastics. The next morning before leaving for a day of laundry bag sales, I filled my tummy with pancakes and my mind with money magnetism. I hopped on a city bus and took a seat right next to another loose, unclaimed five-dollar bill. This time I couldn’t deny the connection. I had magnetized some money into my life with my mind!

I began to feel creepy. Could my thoughts really have that much power? Am I really that responsible for creating my reality? My sunglasses were being removed, and I found the light too blinding to handle. If I was in charge of my own serendipity, then that would mean that my cherished victim stories might be mythical, fiction instread of factual.

I wasn’t yet ready to go from renting my reality to owning it free and clear. I was far too entrenched in blaming my parents, the government and God for my problems. It was a while before I was willing to use affirmations again.

Three years later I was taking classes in meditation and spirituality in NYC offered by Hilda Charlton, a wise and beloved teacher who helped and guided thousands during her lifetime. Every Thursday night about four hundred of us would sit with Hilda. She would love us, entertain us, and then challenge us to look at ourselves and our limited beliefs and identities. She excelled in the art of sunglasses removal, and there were times I did not appreciate her skills at all!

One month Hilda seemed to talk a great deal about her communications with beings from other planets. She casually mentioned that they appeared in her living room and conversed with her about spiritual matters. Each time she broached the subject, my mental “Bah, humbug!” screamed at her. My mind was closed tightly when it came to ET’s, and I didn’t see how intelligent people could believe that visitors from outer space were available for fireside chats. 

One evening Hilda seemed to focus her gaze directly on me as she addressed the group: “Do you want to know why I’m spending all this time talking to you about the ET's? To get you out of your little mental boxes, that’s why! There’s a whole universe out there teeming with life, dimensions upon dimensions! Open your minds, kids!” 

In that moment I saw clearly the uptight stance of my skeptical nature, guardian of my fear, and I prayed for help in freeing myself from that rigidity and opening myself to my natural state of openness. I felt a shift, as if my SKEPTIC said, “All right, I have to admit that there is nothing dangerous about having an open mind about all this.”

Two weeks later a friend called. “Scott, I know you sell things on the sidewalks, and I just discovered two hundred T-shirts in my basement. I’ve had them for years, and I’ll give you a great price! Would you like them?” 


I politely declined, believing that T-shirts in November would not sell at any price. “Oh, that’s too bad!” he said. “They are so nice! They have a picture of a UFO landing on earth and they say “I Believe” on them.” Well, my head started spinning and I thought I heard The Twilight Zone music playing in the background. The SKEPTIC chimed in and said, “Calm down, Scott. It's just a coincidence.” But this time I could not retreat to the comfort of my protective sunglasses. Instead, I let the experience rattle my cages and open my mind. I ended up buying his ET-shirts and selling them at Hilda’s classes. I sold out in two nights.

On another occasion, a friend who was struggling with having to find a new place to live at the last minute asked for some help. I led her through a visualization in which we imagined the perfect living space coming into her world quickly and easily. We mentally toured the rooms of her new home, giving thanks for what we declared would be the easiest move of her life. As we went through the process we both had some resistance, internally muttering, “This is such metaphysical mumbo jumbo!” We voiced the doubts and laughed at ourselves, admitting, “Hey, this can’t hurt, it might even help, and it sure is fun!”

Two days later my friend, while fetching the morning paper in her bathrobe, noticed a For Rent sign on the lawn of her next door neighbor to the left. She investigated the situation and ended up moving into the house. It turned out to be quite literally the easiest move of her life!

These, and many other experiences, have gradually inspired me to make space in my head for a universe filled with endless serendipity, one that works with me and for me as I learn to think in harmony with my desires and focus my attention on positive, joyful things.

My skeptical voice is still present, wanting to draw a chalk circle around my world and say, “This is your safety. Stay within this circle and everything will be predictable and under control.”

But I have accumulated too much evidence, too many cosmic coincidences, to continue seriously counseling with the SKEPTIC.

When he barks his concerns these days, I thank him for sharing, and send him back to his room, a little space I call The Skeptic Tank. 

When I first had the idea to assign him his own room he exclaimed, quite predictably, “Only one room? Is this all the tanks I get?”  

Poor SKEPTIC. The universe seems to be much grander and more magical than your sunglasses can keep up with. Have you considered taking them off and adjusting to the light?

More of Scott Grace at: www.scottsongs.comwww.scottsongs.com

On My Last Relationship and the Importance of Getting Tune Ups for Your Relationship Just Like Your Car

The last relationship I was in lasted ten years, and produced a glorious child, who slipped in past the gates of birth control and blessed my life in ways I could only stumble to put words to.

In the early years of our relationship, my partner and I went on couples retreats once a year, with my dear friends and mentors, Joyce and Barry Vissell. We got all kinds of support from those retreats, and always came home with a sense of renewal about our connection.

I did the music for those retreats, and have done so going on twenty five years.

Then we had our daughter.

My partner started nursing school. I scrambled to play Mr. Mom and get gigs for the bills.

For a million good reasons, we are no longer going on retreats.

Too busy. Too stressed. Can't leave the baby. Financial pressures. You know the drill.

On these weekends, besides having loads of fun, Barry and Joyce teach couples the five most important practices to integrate into your relating, for preventive medicine and to nurture intimacy.

We stopped doing those practices. Again, for what seemed like good reasons.

How many of us were taught relationship skills and practices while growing up? Or in college?

Instead, we are taught that if you find the right person it should just work and be effortless. We take driving lessons to get a license, but when it comes to our relationships, or a marriage license, no education is needed.

Most of us do in relationships what was role modeled by our parents. Or, in rebellion, we do the exact opposite. Neither work.

We started drifting apart. At one point, I asked her what she thought was going on with us?

“Nothing that a Joyce and Barry weekend couldn’t fix," she replied.

We never got to another retreat. A year later we broke up.

This past December I asked my daughter what she most wanted for Christmas. She said for Mommy and Daddy to get back together. I tried holding and comforting her, but with tears streaming down my face, she ended up comforting me.

Would a retreat have turned things around?  I am not sure. We were going in different directions, and our paths were probably just not compatible anymore. But a retreat might have helped us complete our relationship more consciously, more amicably.

Maintaining loving relationships requires work. And skills. Maybe not in the honeymoon phase, when you are lifted together above your egos and get to taste the nectar of your soul connection. But when you come down to earth, and get down to the business of weaving your lives together in a grounded way, regular maintenance is required.

Like with our automobiles. Nobody would dream of owning a car without taking it in for regular oil changes and scheduled services.

Barry and Joyce workshops and retreats are like taking your relationship in for a tune up. Whether your relationship is running great and you want to brush up on your skills, or you have some work you know needs to be done under the hood, couples retreats are invaluable.

I am thrilled that Joyce and Barry are bringing me with them for the first time this year to add my musical and healing gifts to  their seven day couples retreat, February 5-12, on the Big Island of Hawaii.

From their website:  During these 7 days on the Big Island of Hawaii, you will not only open to more love and connection you thought possible, but you will have enough time to integrate these positive changes into your lives back home. We focus on seeing our partner with new eyes, healing dysfunctional patterns, communication of feelings, enhancing the sexual relationship, and practicing loving appreciation. We have couple yoga and meditations, inspiring music, laughter and thrilling sight-seeing – in short, an extraordinary heart-opening experience for you and your partner in the presence of dolphins, whales, giant sea turtles, a beautiful black sand beach, the nearby lava flow, steam vents, delightful snorkeling, and thermal warm ponds.

Please consider giving this gift of a retreat in Hawaii to your relationship.

They have room for several more couples.

It's not too late to jump in.

Click Here too find out more...

With Love,
Scott

The Last Lesson I Learned From My Daughter in 2016

Towards the end of December my mother sent my daughter $150. 


Aysia wanted to use it to get something called An American Girl Doll. I never heard of such a thing, so together we looked it up on Amazon. 

I saw the price, around $150, and I freaked out in the form of an unsolicited lecture. You know, the kind children automatically tune out.

I told her I would not allow her to spend her money on such a thing, and started lecturing her on the trappings of status. She could get a doll for $25 and have just as much fun with it. It's the imagination we bring to playing with a doll, or with anything, that makes it fun.

I thought I was steering her to the high road, turning her away from the trappings of materialism.

But I was throwing a wet blanket on something innocent and sweet.

And she wasn’t buying the lecture.

In fact, I could feel her deflating, withdrawing, going inside herself.


I knew there was a high road here, and it was I who veered off it.

After I took her to school I had a walk with a friend and we talked about how I could have had an open mind and asked Aysia questions about what she would like to do with the doll. I could have celebrated her desire, instead of putting my foot down and laying down the law with a “Bah, Humbug” attitude.

And it was, after all, ‘her’ money, not mine.
 
Our desires, unless we are seeking to hurt others, are expressions of our innocence. Desires are our Life Force, seeking to play and create and expand.

Make our desires wrong, or make ourselves wrong for having them, and we cast ourselves right out of the garden into the desert of unworthiness.

I felt a flush of regret about how I treated her.  

And relief, because I got the lesson. 

I still wasn’t clear about letting her get the doll, but I was clear that from now on, whenever Aysia expressed a desire, I would do my best to celebrate it with her without making her wrong for wanting it.
 
When I picked Aysia up from school I told her how sorry I was for the way that I had talked to her, and asked for her forgiveness.

Aysia and I went straight from school to meeting two of her friends in town. We were all strolling down a street on our way to play in a park when Aysia spotted an American Girl doll in a store window. It was slightly used, and priced at $75. 

Aysia was drooling with desire. She looked at me with puppy eyes, and her "Please?" was the purest, sweetest request I had ever heard.

But she, as all eight year old's, knows exactly how to turn on the charm and manipulate with her cuteness.

I did not want to be silly putty wrapped around her finger.

I checked in, and heard a resounding yes from my heart’s wisdom.

We went to the park and Aysia and her two girlfriends proceeded to play with the doll, dress her, comb her hair, and name her. I witnessed such joy in their process. And felt so good about it.

It was as if a part of me, all intellectual and grumpy, had a change of heart, softening and opening. The Grinch that almost stole my daughter’s Christmas grew up a bit that day. And my heart grew a size or two in the process.

Since then I have watched her create a world with Sabrina, her doll. Her mothering instincts and talents have come out to play. She nurtures and cares for her.

Sometimes there are naps. “Shhh, Daddy, Sabrina is sleeping.”

We have a new member of the family.




Now I Know What It Feels Like to Receive A Song!

Last week two sisters hired me to do a Song Portrait for their mother’s birthday. Nothing unusual about that. But as I was creating it, the music of the song I was writing started sounding like the opening number from Guys and Dolls, “I’ve Got The Horse Right Here.” Although I doubted it, my guidance was clearly moving me in that direction. It turned out, that show tune was one of their mother’s favorites.

The sisters reported back to me that she was over the moon about her song.

Then, I got quite a surprise when their mother and father created a video and a song of their own to thank me. Now I know how it feels to be serenaded! Take a look and a listen here

And they all gave me permission to share their Song Portrait as well:  Birthday Song Portrait For Evy

 
You Deserve a Happy New You Song!

The beginning of the year is a great time to have a Selfie Song Portrait to help keep you on track for 2017. I call it a Happy New You Song. The subject matter is you, your goals, your power to manifest, and what you need to remember to stay focused on your passion, your well being, and the fullness and richness already in your life. A song is a great way to keep your focus off of what you seem to lack, and keep it on what makes you feel excited, hopeful, and grateful. Email me at scott@scottsongs.com if interested.

 Hawaii in February

My dear friends Joyce and Barry Vissell, who have been writing books, leading retreats, and helping couples build relationship skills for forty years are bringing me with them this February 5-12  to provide music for their Hawaii Couples retreat, which is both a vacation and a workshop. From their website:  During these 7 days on the Big Island of Hawaii, you will not only open to more love and connection than you thought possible, but you will have enough time to integrate these positive changes into your lives back home. We focus on seeing our partner with new eyes, healing dysfunctional patterns, communication of feelings, enhancing the sexual relationship, and practicing loving appreciation. We have couple yoga and meditations, inspiring music, laughter and thrilling sight-seeing – in short, an extraordinary heart-opening experience for you and your partner in the presence of dolphins, whales, giant sea turtles, a beautiful black sand beach, the nearby lava flow, steam vents, delightful snorkeling, and thermal warm ponds.

Click Here to find out more

In Case You Are Not Over It (The Election Results)

"What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly."

-Richard Bach, Illusions

  
Hey, in case you are still processing the results of the most recent US election, in case you are not over it, neither am I.

Please don’t get over it, fellow human with a heart in your chest.  

Treasure your trembling.

Your quivering heart beats the drum of your sacred vulnerability. 

Sentient beings accustomed to feeling sentient things are shitting sentient bricks right now.  
 
Feel the ground shaking? Not just in your belly, but across the globe? 

It’s earthquake time.

Massive shake ups precedes massive wake ups.


"It takes great learning to understand that all things, events, encounters and circumstances are helpful.”

 -A Course in Miracles


Earthquake tremors are here by divine appointment, shaking us loose from old beliefs that no longer serve.

Like the belief that one person in an oval office can have power over you and your life.

That's outdated software.

A president does not preside over your consciousness, nor your creations. You are in the drivers seat. Perhaps you've been asleep at the wheel, but events like this are designed so that large numbers of people can wake up and drive more consciously.
 
Not to talk you out of being shaken up.

DONALD TRUMP is our next president. It's HUGE!
 
If an extra terrestrial race comes to visit us in the next four years, Donald might have a hefty hand at representing humanity and negotiating deals. Perhaps he will make Planet Earth great again. 

I hope you are laughing. Or crying. I'm doing both.


HOW CAN THIS BE GOOD?

America has had cancer, stage 4, for quite some time.
Washington is clogged and riddled with corruption, gridlocked and unable to move forward and get up to speed with humanity's evolution. Energy is not circulating. 

Obama, whom I consider to be one of the most emotionally intelligent and spiritually evolved Presidents ever to hold office, did his best to address the cancer with the equivalent of healthy eating and gentle cleansing herbs, but a different kind of medicine is needed to wake up mass consciousness. 

Obama's maturity and gentleness, God bless him, is not for stage 4.

Donald is aggressive chemotherapy. From his kind of leadership there will be quite a fallout, and not just our hair.

During these four years of treatment we are going to need to support our immune system, and especially build it back up when the radioactive orange man has exited the body politic. 

You and I are cells in humanity's immune system. 

That is why despair is not an option. Don't indulge. You are needed. 

Come as you are, and follow your passion. You will be put to task.

  Please Don't Polarize


I was raised to be true blue state liberal/democrat, the kind of person who would disdain Donald Trump and all the people who voted for him. 

That’s my upbringing. But is it my highest truth?

Ghandi was once asked if he was a Hindu. 

“Yes I am", he proclaimed. "I am also a Muslim, Christian, a Buddhist and a Jew.” 
 
I’d like to say, “I am a democrat, republican, green, white, black, hispanic, middle class, first class, coach class, liberal, conservative, progressive, feminist, gay, straight, redneck and transgender.  I am all of these things and none of them."


It is so easy to dig your heels into some kind of attitude that polarizes you. The North Pole and the South Pole are the areas of the planet that are the most isolated and frigid, and so becomes your heart when you perceive yourself as separate and superior to those who vote or think differently than you. 

Please don't polarize.

Labels and ideologies divide us.  

Walk a mile in the other's shoes instead.

Perhaps it’s time for a red, white, and blue hat that says, Make America Whole Again.


Could it be that this election leads to a global crisis, one that is so epic that it compels us to unify in response to it?

Like in the recent movie Arrival, where visitors from outer space forced the competing nations of the earth to rise above what's petty and work harmoniously together?

Could our nation's biggest narcissist end up being a servant to humanity in spite of himself, an Agent Orange for Good?

And how can you and I be helpful?

How can we light candles and stay away from cursing the darkness? Here's two tips, for starters.

1. Be a witness.

2. Don't watch the news.


In 1985 there was a movie called Witness.
 
Harrison Ford plays a policeman who has to hide out in Amish country to protect an Amish boy who witnesses a corrupt police officer murder someone. 

The bad cop seeks to silence (kill) the boy.

Eventually he finds the farm where they are hiding, capturing the boy and disarming Harrison Ford. Things look pretty bleak.

But Harrison Ford had alerted the entire town, and the corrupt cop, about to do the dirty deed, finds himself surrounded by a hundred peaceful Amish.

They circle around, holding space, observing without reacting. 

But the power they yield is intense, and palpable. The police officer looks around him. Peaceful people with piercing gazes are shining light upon the evil he is about to carry out.

He breaks down and falls to his knees. There is too much witnessing presence for him to go through with it.  Harrison Ford takes his gun away, and arrests him. The boy is saved.

Many of us have been in training for many years to be witnesses. 

It's time to amp it up and circle together.

Some of us will be called to play a more active role; marches on Washington, boycotts, protest songs, peaceful resistance, joining  with the momentum that is just getting started at Standing Rock. 

For those of you inspired to a political arena, Michael Moore’s Facebook Page is a great resource to connect and be informed. 


Adversity Brings Out Such Amazing Things

Although I was just a boy,  I remember Vietnam. I remember the excitement of the social and political revolution brought about by the need to stand up to Richard Nixon and the hypocrisy of the Vietnam War. 

The music, art, comedy and culture that was born from those times still thrills me today.

Can you open your mind to the possibility that the Trump years can be thrilling? 


It's all about what you bring to the table.
 
It's all about where you choose to focus, and what you do with your precious energy. 

As always, there are but two choices. Lying down or taking a stand. Lighting a candle or cursing the darkness. Fear or love.

Depression and despair are signs you are lying down, curling up into a little ball of ain't it awful, listening to your ego's interpretations, drinking in the cool aid offered by mainstream media. 

Ah, The Media

The news industry is not in the business of keeping your informed. 

It's in the profit based business of keeping you afraid.

If it bleeds it leads.  

Fear sells.

And so we watch, transfixed.

Sure, it's captivating. You are being held captive.

If you must watch, witness yourself while you watch.

Witness how shallow your breathing is. Witness how you barely move when watching or reading.

I do not have a TV. A few days a week I tune into the headlines from Stephen Colbert and a few others comic luminaries. I get enough. And it goes down easy with laughter.

If I catch myself starting to get negative about all the negativity, I turn it off, and work on my attitude.

I take a temporary time-out from YouTube, Facebook, and anything else that my ego is using to keep me afraid in the name of staying informed.

I am inviting you to join me in freeing your mind from the toxic media.

The news is addictive, processed and packaged junk food.

Just say no.

So, to summarize, it looks like Donald Trump is going to be President. Don’t get over it. Do let it move you, accelerate you, shake you, and wake you.

It’s all for the best, but to see it that way takes a leap of faith.

I’ve taken that leap. I'm holding the vision.

And I welcome you to borrow my eyes, temporarily, until you allow your own inner optometrist to adjust your lenses to the clear vision of optimism.


"You are not a realist unless you believe in miracles" 

-Anwar Sadat


I don't do this attitudinal and emotional work all by myself. I have a weekly coaching session with someone who helps me tremendously.

And I, in turn, am a coach and guide for others.  

If you are sensing you can use some help surfing the changes, coping with the holidays, or finding your higher ground while the earth shakes, shoot me an email (scott@scottsongs.com) or give me a call (415-755-8140). 

I'd be honored to assist.




 
Scott Grace creates some of the most amazing gifts you can possible give, Song Portraits, which  deeply and sweetly honor and appreciate your loved ones in personalized songs.

Being Grateful for Donald Trump - A Thanksgiving Message

There is something I want to call myself out on:  the tendency to see people who did not vote the way I did as the opposition. Us versus them thinking...

When I think that way I am spreading divisiveness. 

I am right and they are wrong.

There plenty of that going around these days, fires of righteousness burning high, which is a way of avoiding having to face and feel grief and disappointment.

I don't want to fan those flames.

I want to be putting out fires instead, by choosing out of the us versus them mentality.

Two articles and a video helped me shift that over the weekend.

The articles helped me have empathy for those who voted differently.

And that brought me some peace.

The articles are somewhat intellectual. The helped me give deep thought to it all. And that’s been nourishing for me.

I've needed some contemplation and understanding.

Feel like you can use some too?

Here’s the first one, offering wisdom about why Trump got elected…

How Half Of America Lost Its F**king Mind

The second one is about Bringing Empathy into our Politics

And the third is a video by spiritual teacher, Matt Kahn. He gave the talk a few days after the election. I’ve watched it twice, and will continue to watch it. I absorb through repetition.

It's a very positive spin on what is happening.

Please be sure not to watch while multi-tasking, driving, or operating heavy machinery!

Here it is:  The End Of the Old Paradigm

And now, my thanksgiving message...

Being Grateful for Donald Trump

 
I have been experimenting with being grateful for things my ego judges as shitty.

Like being grateful for 'negative' emotions.

When I am feeling angry,  I am learning to be grateful for how passionate I feel, and how, when I channel my anger towards what want instead of what I don’t want, how my anger can lead to motivation and constructive action. When I’m fired up, I have so much energy at my disposal. I breathe deeper. I’m lucky to be able to feel all that passion.  YAY ANGER!

When I am feeling sad, I can be grateful for my tears as a cleansing agent, the way rain nourishes and replenishes the earth. Sadness opens my heart. I have more compassion for my fellow humans. Sadness is also a form of surrender. It is letting go of being stuck in my head.  Thank you sadness!

Gratitude for fear? Why not! Fear is like my psyche’s military. When I am scared, I can be grateful there is a part of me that is looking out for me. There have been many times in my life fear was an appropriate response and saved my butt. Thank you fear for always being on the lookout for danger. You are here to protect and serve me. I am grateful for your service.

Now, onto the graduate course in Gratitude University.

Can I be grateful for Donald Trump!?!

Recently I asked my spirit guides for help in seeing him differently. 

They blew my mind by saying that they think he is the perfect president for this moment in time.

They offered me this metaphor from my own life:

When I started doing cleanses once a year twenty years ago, I used herbs that I now consider unnecessarily harsh, much too harsh for my body’s present needs. But at that time my system was so clogged it needed dynamite to blast things open and get things flowing again.

My colon in particular was pretty full of shit.

Kind of like Washington D.C. has been for a very long time.

The herbs I used back then I would not use long term, but they did blast the dam and got the river flowing again, thank Goodness.

Now, in my annual ten day cleanse, (which I’ll be doing January 1st though the 10th if anyone might like to join me), the detoxification is much more gentle. I don’t need dynamite. I don’t get headaches, diarrhea, and lose sleep like I did the first few cleanses.

Donald, according to my guides, is America's first cleanse. He is going to shake everything up, and that is what is needed at this time. They say gentler, more positive cleansing agents will soon follow, and they did not see him as President for long…four years ....or less. 

But they said we will look back at the part he played and be grateful. His ego may be in it for the limelight, but the Bigger Picture of our Evolution, sometimes called The Divine Plan, will use him, ego and all, for a greater purpose.

Today's shit, tomorrow's fertilizer.

So I give thanks in advance for the cleanse that is about to happen, Donald and his staff of toxic, abrasive herbs. I give thanks for the vast numbers of people who will get fired up and involved in our political process. Occupy Wall Street was small potatoes compared to what is about to happen.

YAY ANGER! YAY PASSION! YAY CHANGE!

And... Happy Thanksgiving!



Scott Grace creates personal song portraits as gifts to honor those you love, living or deceased. Check out samples at www.scottsongs.com. Email him at info@scottsongs.com if you have someone in mind you would like to honor.



"Thanks again for my son Alex's Song Portrait. He asks to listen to it nearly every night since you recorded it for us a year ago, and it helps him go to sleep at bedtime feeling special. You have an amazing talent."

-A Happy Customer

 

Scott's Grace-Filled Cleanse - Resetting Your Body, Mind and Spirit for 2019

  We start on Tuesday, January 1st and go for a full ten days.

There are three things for you to do to get in on the cleanse. 

1. Pay me $60.  I'll be available by phone, Facetime and text, (415) 755 8140,  email - scott@scottsongs.com and Facebook to support you during this cleanse. Your money is your way of saying thank you for my time, leadership, and expertise.

Here are three ways to do that in order of preference:

A) With PayPal, send the money to scott@scottsongs.com via Family and Friends.I like it cause it is instant and I get to keep all of it.

B) Make a check out to Scott Grace and snail mail it to me at Scott Grace, 162 Forrest Avenue, Fairfax, CA, 94930. The moment the check is in the mail you are you are in!

C) Send me your credit card info via email. If you send it in three separate emails it will be secure.  I'll need your name as it appears on the card, your numbers, exp date, zip code, and three numbers on the back of the card. 

Or you can call me at 414 755 8140 with your credit card info.


2.  Click Here to Join Our Facebook Page

This is where we will be sharing tips and joining in on mutual support.

3.  Buy the products. These are products I have researched thoroughly, and have taken for years. I have also discussed them with a medical intuitive that I have used since 1990 and made sure he agreed that these products not only get the job done, but make a great combination for whole body cleansing.

Here are the products we will be taking.

Click on each of the links and they will take you to and where to get them on Amazon.

1. Essiactive Tea Capsules - The cleansing dosage is one capsule first thing in the morning and one before bedtime with a full glass of water. Empty stomach is most effective, but not mandatory. Look up Essiac Tea on a search engine and its reputation as a cancer fighter, cleansing tonic, and immune system booster. (Not that anyone is making medical claims, God forbid!)

This is a whole body cleansing formula, and it works with cleansing the blood and virtually every organ. but for some reason is does not excel when it comes to addressing the colon, which for most of us, needs major attention.

Which brings us to:

2. Super Colon Cleanse:   Two of these twice a day with full glasses of water.

3. HealthPlus Colon Cleanse:   Five of these twice a day with lots of water.

 Why do we take two different colon cleansing products? I council with a medical intuitive that suggests it. Also, the same company makes them both and suggests that they work well together.

4.  Take three teaspoons a day of Alkalize and Detox Green Superfood 

 It's not the greatest tasting green superfood mix out there, but it is the best one for a cleanse. People often feel so fantastic towards the tail end and after this cleanse that they ask me which of the products are appropriate to take very day? This one is it. I take two heaping teaspoons of this in my smoothie or with lots of water every day of my life.

5. Purchase and follow the directions of Enyzmatic Therapy's Whole Body Cleanse with Probiotics

This may seem like overdoing it on the herbs and cleansing ingredients, but this combination comes highly recommended by my guides, and I've been using these products for years with great success. every year I ask them if I should mix them up and every year they say nope, stick to these products.


Here are other things that are important during a cleanse.
 
A) LIQUIDATE YOUR ASSETS: Besides taking those five products religiously for ten days, a cleanse is supported by drinking an annoying amount of water. You know, the kind of liquidating that makes you have to go to the bathroom a few times an hour.

Let your water be filtered, spring or distilled. Not tap, unless it's well water. You can mix lemon in it for taste and added alkalinity.  Doing a cleanse without drinking lots of water is like doing laundry with some great detergent but not enough water. The herbs don't do their job if there isn’t sufficient water to flush things out with.

Herbal tea is fine, especially 

B) Exercise But Don't Run Marathons

 Brisk walks, stretching, and yoga are better than lifting weights or running long distances. Err on the side of Yin over Yang.

C) Foods To Avoid For Ten Days: 

Coffee, any kind of caffeine, alcohol, white flour, gluten, white rice, lots of grains, bread, desserts in general, pizza, muffins, croissants, cheese, red meat (some organic chicken, turkey and healthy cold water fish is OK), anything processed (if it comes in a package, or if your grandmother would not recognize it as food, it’s processed), non-fermented soy (miso and tempe are fine, tofu not so good), fried foods, wheat and sugar. 

D) Go Organic, as much as you can stand. 


E) Perfection Not Required

Screw ups are part of the process, not signs that you have failed. 

If you slip, forgive yourself and get back on the horse.


F) Go Alkaline.  We are all overly acidic. Cleansing is leaning towards the alkalinity of things. If you are unsure of something, Google whether it is acid or alkaline. Lemon, by the way, is acidic but turns alkaline in your body. One of my favorite things to drink during a cleanse is lemon water. So simple, so tasty. Add some stevie and you have lemonade.


More Tips

I really want to emphasize that wheat and sugar are best to be avoided. Don't buy all these expensive cleansing products and then not follow a cleansing diet. Yes, you can do it! Just ten days, and then you can go back to your comforts, if they still call you!

Ideally, the only sugar you will consume for ten days will be from fresh fruit (not dried).

Whether you are gluten intolerant, gluten sensitive, or don’t have any idea what gluten is or isn’t, it is a good idea to avoid gluten during a cleanse. At it's best, it makes your digestive system work hard to process, and this is about taking a rest.

Avoid pasta. Contrary to a TV commercial, pasta is not hand picked from trees, it is processed in a factory.

Generally speaking, grains are not great for a cleanse, but if you can't conceive of life without them...

Brown rice is better than white, as it has fiber. White is stripped of it.

Even better grains would be quinoa, which is actually a seed, millet, and amaranth. These are all gluten free. Quinoa is high in protein.

About Protein


Although not mandatory, cleansing is a good time to lighten up on protein.

Beans, seeds, nuts, and lentils are good protein sources.


Whey protein powder is fine.

For meat eaters that can't conceive of a change, some organic poultry and fish is fine.

Fermented soy is fine, like miso or tempeh.

(Sugar free) yogurt and organic eggs are OK if you crave dairy. 

But Jeez Louise, Please No Cheese! And avoid pork and beef, please.


SO WHAT DO WE EAT?

Soups with lots of veggies.

Salads! 

Fruits and Veggies!

(Fruits and veggies are your bread and butter during a cleanse.) 

Avocado is such a healthy fat

Hummus and guacamole are great snack dips for veggies.


Coconut oil is great. So many uses. Stick to that if you must use oil to cook. (But try avoiding cooking with oil for ten days.) 

Hungry? Sometimes I take a tablespoon of coconut oil into my mouth just to curb hunger.

Wanna snack? Try these:

Fresh fruit. A banana with almond butter on it. In general, stock up on veggies like chopped celery and carrots around and dip them in nut butters (except peanut butter) guac and hummus.

I love making popcorn with coconut oil and Himalayan Crystal Salt?!? 

Organic almonds and pistachios, any kind of nuts make a great snack.

More tips and wisdom will be up on the Facebook Page in response to your questions. 

And please post what is working for you.

Put my number in your phone. You can call or text me with questions or when you are in a moment of weakness and need a moment of support.

I'm at 415 755 8140

Happy Cleansing!

With Joy,
Scott Grace

+

A Twelve Step Program For Surviving a Trump Presidency

My daughter had been so looking forward to the first female president.

I saw her the day after Trump won, and asked if she wanted to talk.

I imagined she felt disappointed, frustrated, and a little frightened.

She did not want to talk. She wanted to build a fairy house instead.

I felt annoyed at her for avoiding difficult feelings about a difficult subject.

Seven years old, and I was expecting her to adhere to my ideas of emotional intelligence forged from decades of therapy.

She started building a fairy house.

I was not ready to let go of talking about the election.

But at least I recognized that it was my need, not hers. 

I told her that I was feeling disappointed, frustrated, and yes, scared.

I asked her if she could stop for a moment and give me a hug.

We hugged, and that comforted me.

Then I started judging myself for revealing my fear to someone whom was looking to me for her sense of safety, as well as her definition of things.

Then I graduated to worrying about how my needyness might be  screwing her up.

 Finally I had enough of my ego's endless drama, got down on my knees, and helped her build a fairy house.

I imagine lots of us are feeling disappointed, frustrated, and yes, scared by the prospects of a Trump Presidency.

I’d like to speak some soothing words to the parts of me that are trembling, as we all grapple with finding the serenity to accept the things we can’t change, the courage to blah, blah, blah…

I’m beyond being soothed by slogans right now.

What am I in the mood for is a new twelve step program, 
twelve ideas that might serve as stepping stones to higher ground as we recover from earthquake aftershocks to find acceptance of what is.

So here goes:

A Twelve Step Program For Surviving a Trump Presidency

1) Honor your grief. Acknowledge that you are powerless over the election results. Go through the stages. They do not necessarily show up in size order, but the general idea is: 1. Shock & Denial  2. Anger 3. Bargaining 4. Depression 5. Acceptance

Tears that are not shed dry up inside and harden into disowned shadow, insensitivity to others, and an absence of vulnerability.

Want a good example of someone who has built up a lifetime of unprocessed grief? Donald Trump!

2) Whatever qualities you think Donald lacks, give more of them.

A) See him lacking kindness? Be extra kind to yourself and those around you.

B) See him as someone who always has to be right? Don’t match his energy! Don’t insist on being right about how wrong he is. Look with mindfulness at your own attachment to being right, and choose to be happy instead.

C) See him as someone who is not able to respect people he disagrees with?  Listen deeply to people with opposing opinions, and see how they have the same needs as yourself, just different strategies about how to go about getting their needs met. 

Find that common ground where you both human….
 
 
3) Remind yourself that you are the President of your United States. You are the leader of your free world. You have both houses of congress behind every thought you think. You can cultivate peace in your inner nation, even with Donald Trump as President. Choose your attitude. Don't let it be chosen for you.

4) Hold your loved ones close. Tell them that it is in times of sadness and in the toughest of days where we often find our true mettle. (From a tweet by George Takei, the actor who played Sulu in Star Trek.)

5) Within our hearts we know the society we wish to live in. No one can take that vision from us. We are each of us keepers of that promise. (Sulu tweets again!)

6)  Remember this: Our country has seen wars and grave injustices, slavery and even civil war in its past. Yet we found our way through. We will now, too. (My last Sulu tweet.)

7) Own your power. Voting for Donald is an anguished cry for help, a 911 call made by masses of folks who are feeling powerless in their lives. Don’t be one of them. Do not give Donald Trump, nor any other person, your power.

8)  Do something. Anything. Anger without action is self-destructive. But, with constructive action, anger helps change the world for the better. Here's the antidote to despair and depression: Instead of focusing on what you don’t want, focus on what you do want, and find some action step to take.  You might be inspired to political activism. Or to set up a monthly recurring donation to Planned Parenthood. Is there a blog post inside you to write?  Do something. Anything. Rise up. Or get down on your knees and help a child build a fairy house.

9)  Fear Not!  Donald feels threatened by Mexicans and Muslims. Don’t feel threatened by Donald Trump. Let the buck stop here. Only your ego can feel threatened, project blame, and build walls. So build bridges instead. Leave acting out the ego to Donald Trump. 


For many of us, Donald being President is like the second coming of our worst fears. But if it wasn’t Donald it would be something or someone else. Fear always finds something to attach itself to. 

And fear is always Forgetting Everything is All  Right. 

For potent and poetic fear busting, watch on YouTube as I, the Spiritual Dr. Seuss, recite: The Story of Fear and it's Grand Departure from Your Nervous System

10) Take Up Drinking! Now that Donald is going to be president, you have a duty to drink in copious amounts of Stephen Colbert, Samantha Bee, Trevor Noah, James Corden, Seth Meyers, John Oliver, Bill Maher, and other comedians who help us laugh. If, like me, you don't have a television, you can watch clips on YouTube. 

The world is not going insane... it has always been. So laugh it up. Get those endorphins going. 

You can't laugh and be fearful at the same time.

11) Welcome Major Changes. I studied with a spiritual teacher in the1980’s named Hilda Charlton. She had the gift of prophecy, and saw things about the future that have been coming true before my eyes ever since. Over and over again she warned us that external institutions built on fear and greed would eventually collapse, including entire financial and political systems. 

She saw all of it coming.

She reminded us that there would be a higher purpose to it all, that from it would come rebirth and renewal. She stressed repeatedly that we were made for these times.

Those of us who have faced major changes in our personal life, who have lost houses, security, incomes, mates, or have faced life threatening illnesses, can look back and see how those calamities turned out to be blessings in disguise, divine earthquakes that shook our foundations enough to get what is false inside us to crumple.

Could Donald be global medicine bitter enough that the whole world’s immune system kicks in and says enough!?!

In Chinese, the word ‘crisis' is made up of two words, danger and opportunity. 

These are indeed interesting times.


12) Grab people by the heart, not the pussy. 

I had a chance to put this into practice just now, while taking a coffee break.
   
Writing this article was hard. I had to push past the urge to isolate and stew in my own despair.

Finishing it has been even harder.

I needed help, so I went to the local java hut in the hopes that some caffeine would jolt the rest of this out of me.

A Hispanic woman asked me what I wanted. 

Something completely unexpected came out of me, at a volume so everyone in the store could hear me.

“I want to tell you that I love you, you belong here, and that I will never let you or your family be deported.”  

“Thank you for saying that. I love you too. We are a community. We need each other.”

We both fumbled around for what to do or say next.

I managed to remember that I came in for coffee.

But what I really came in for, what we all came in for, is to remember and demonstrate the power of love over fear.

To take care of each other.

And no president or political system can stop us. 

Ever.


Scott Grace is a life coach that is known on YouTube as the Spiritual Dr. Seuss. In addition, he creates and performs Song Portraits, custom made personalized songs that celebrate your loved ones, living or deceased. Explore his gifts at www.scottsongs.com